An Easy Hack To Articulate What You Want
Does people "manifesting" things make you a liiiiittle suspicious?
I live in Venice, California. Apart from maybe Ubud, Bali or like, some inter-dimensional star space, it might be the most 'woo woo' place on this Earth. People are often "manifesting" left, right and center, be it life partners or Burning Man tickets.
As a fairly practical gal, this term drove me nuts until last year, when I did my Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) program, and I figure out what they were doing...
But first, a QUICK DEFINITION OF NLP:
A communication technique that uses body language & positive verbal framing to change the grooves in your neural pathways so you start to think differently, act differently and do the things you want to do.
NLP THEORY GOES:
- define what you want in words, pictures and feelings often enough to -->
- redirect & change your thoughts which -->
- shifts your negative beliefs so you -->
- raise your positive feelings and that -->
- motivates you to change your actions leading to -->
- a new, positive reaction from the outside world
I wrote a short blog post about that here.
When I ask my clients what they want, it's very common for people to talk about running from a negative experience they had instead of defining what they actually want.
EXAMPLE:
"I want a boss that isn't a psycho."
vs
"I want my boss to mentor me and foster an environment of open inquiry."
When you frame a thought negatively, you prime your brain to avoid something. That is NOT the same as telling it what you want.
So, cool -- in your next job, you get a boss that "isn't a psycho" but they're not a mentor & don't foster an open environment so you're back to feeling "eh" about him when you could have been looking for & gotten what you actually wanted.
This simple shift, from negative to positive is a powerful new way I invite my clients to practice thinking & speaking. And it makes all the difference. Which brings me to the woo crew.
When people "manifest," what they're really doing is ASKING, POSITIVELY & IN SPECIFIC, for what they want, even if it's just to themselves.
It's not magic (though I fully support the idea & joy that comes with feeling like it is) - they are just putting out there what they really really want in a group text, to their network, in a list they keep on their phone, whatever.
What's something you know you want but haven't taken the time to define?
HERE'S YOUR NEXT STEPS.
- Do that. Define it.
- Do it in the positive. Even doing it for yourself gets your brain scanning for the right thing instead of avoiding the bad thing.
- Start talking about it.
IT MAKES A BETTER STORY
If you have a big future plan or vision to share with others & need sponsorship to make it happen it's absolutely crucial you learn to tell speak in the positive instead of being stuck in what didn't work in the past. No one wants to follow a downer.